The challenge of being curvy | Summer edition

Ah the hour glass figure.. the one that looks glamorous & sounds great but is more complicated than you think. More complicated especially when you're only 5ft4', and every calorie you intake seems to be optimized a thousand times. The body where every single feature has a dramatically different size, lets talk about my size 10 top, size 8 waste but size 16 bum and hips.. I'm sorry body but whats that about? Whilst it looks great when you find that one perfect item, you are left with the initial search of finding that one perfect item. Now I may not be at the top of my confidence levels at the moment in regards to my body, but this post is a way of venting how I feel about my insecurities and what I intend to do to push myself further and conquer the fear of the curves.

Now I've always been a curvy person but of course as you grow, certain parts of your body grow too.. Hormones and all that. Added onto my increased appetite and freedom of portion sizes when I moved away for uni. I mean I did need to gain a little bit of weight and I'm at a pretty comfortable weight at the moment, and everything would be great if I wasn't so damn curvy. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change my body for the world and I think women and men of all shapes and sizes are beautiful and pure but some body shapes are a hell of a lot more difficult than others to cater for. 

Now I'm a winter kind of girl, always have been and always will be. Partly to do with the fact that I'm so utterly in love with winter fashion, a cute woolly jumper pear of black skinny jeans, Doc martens and a cosy coat but also partly for the fact that I can fully cover up and just not worry about my little lumps or bumps being on show or worrying about perfectly fitting clothing items. The truth is baggy clothes are just within my comfort zone, not because of the way my body looks but because they're easy. So when summer comes around trying to clothe myself is a whole new ball game, chubby thighs and beautiful stretch marks suddenly become chub rub and scaring that people can't seem to take their eyes off. It becomes something that in the darker months you wouldn't even take a second look at that suddenly becomes centre of attention, as if your stretch marks and chubby areas are you standing on a stage in front of 100 people staring at things they never would have noticed had they just walked past you on a street.

But here's the thing, when you get to a place in your life where you feel comfortable with yourself and you find that one special pair of culottes or that super tight bad-ass dress that you just feel yourself in, loving yourself suddenly seems worth it. You look at all the things you love, and you think damn look at me. Yes I may have a few little scars in a few weird places and I may have to talcum powder the insides of my legs when I wear a dress but I am me. This is who I am and this is how I look. And if you're in the same position where you find different seasons harder than others then you just need to remember, as long as you're healthy and happy with life you need to embrace who you are and what you look like. We only have one body and one life, the most important thing to do is to live it. 

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